Booooooom!!! It’s wedding planning time, and all of a sudden you’re thrown into a whole new world. A wedding seemed like an easy enough task… but now all of a sudden there’s a million different things to do, decisions to make and vendors to organise. Your Pinterest board is flowing, your mind is swimming and things seem to be really escalating!!
So stop right there, thank you very much (🎵I need somebody with a human tooouuuucccchhh 🎵). You want your wedding to reflect who you are as individuals and make sure that’s always at the forefront of your mind when you are planning.
What is a wedding?
According to a very quick google search for a definition, a wedding is a ceremony where two people are united in marriage!! That’s it! The rest of it all stems from tradition and societal expectations.
So, if a wedding is basically just a ceremony where you are legally united in marriage…. What can you do to make sure your wedding is unique to you?!
Conversations to have together before you start planning….
Too often it’s assumed that the ‘bride’ is going to be doing all the planning and their partner is simply going to grace them with their presence…. But it’s 2022!!!!!
This is a day for the two of you! Whether you’re a bride and groom, bride and bride, groom and groom or you’d prefer not be labelled as either of these…. It’s a day to celebrate who you are a couple.
Sooooo…. Here are some conversations to have with each other before you start planning .
1. How many guests and who you are inviting.
This is an important one!! Whether it’s an elopement or a grand affair, determining the number of guests and who you are inviting is crucial to finding a place or venue.
2. Your expectations for the day.
Are you after something small and intimate, something super cool and different or a big lavish event? This is important to discuss beforehand so when you begin planning there’s a reference point so things don’t escalate beyond what you wanted in the first place.
It’s also crucial to discuss things that are important to you before you begin planning. This could be to do with location, outfits, traditions, moments, look… etc.
How much money are you hoping to spend on your wedding. Chat to friends who have had their weddings recently to get an idea of general costs. If you can’t find someone to help you, ask in some wedding planning Facebook groups to get an idea.
Now onto the planning!!!! You’ve decided on how many guests, the important parts to you on the day and have an idea of a budget! Time to get it done, woo hoo hoo.
Making your wedding unique to you
Ceremony space and reception venue
Whether you’re eloping or having a big summer blow out, choosing a venue is your first step. Firstly, you’ll need to decide if you’re sticking to your local area or are going to venture somewhere else! This will be dependant on your guest list of course – some people want to stick closer to home to ensure their guests can make it! Others may be up for a mini holiday for a destination wedding. Also keep in mind a month of the year you’re hoping to have it in. If you’re in Australia, many weddings take place between September – April, but this doesn’t mean this is when you have to have yours.
Next, start googling venue options! Make a short list of 4-5 venues that you both like the look of and see if you can organise a tour. Get an idea of costs, ask them any questions you have and then make a decision.
You have a date for your wedding (as in a date of the year…)! Yaaaayyyy!!!!
Righto – it’s time to choose a style/vibe for your wedding. Now the venue is secured, you will have a better idea of what you’re working with.
Don’t have any ideas?!
Start a Pinterest board and see if there’s a particular theme you’re gravitating towards. When I say theme, I mean something like
⁃ Dark and moody
⁃ 70s, 80s, 90s
When you define a ‘vibe’ or ‘theme’ it makes it a lot easier to stay on track and also to narrow down your Pinterest searches.
Check out this board to see if any tickle your fancy
Start your own…
The beauty of this is that you can do whatever you want!!!!! You can create a whole vibe for your wedding based on what makes the two of you unique. Need some ideas?! Here we go…
Do you love……?!?!
Travelling – Design your wedding styling dedicated to a special place to two of you have visited. This could be anything from Italian villas to the bright lights of Vegas. Thinking something a little bit closer to home? Why not a giant tipi to show your love for the great outdoors! Glamping at its finest!
Music – From Rock N’ Roll vibes or the Phantom of the opera, these are great ideas to do something cool with.
Movies – Use your favourite movies or use the movie industry for inspiration!! I’m thinking vintage movie theatres of the glamour of Hollywood.
Wedding traditions you can choose to have or not!
White dress and black suit
Traditionally, this what people wear as the bride and groom. This idea of ‘bride and groom’ has been challenged and thankfully weddings are inclusive of all types of love. What colour you wear on your wedding day is entirely up to you!!!!! If I had my time again, I would wear silver sequins because that’s so much more me than a white dress.
Check out some awesome wedding outfit inspiration if a white dress or black suit isn’t for you….
Getting ready separately and seeing each other for the first time at the ceremony
You may like the idea of seeing each other for the first time at your ceremony, but is it something you HAVE to do?! Nope!!!!
Get ready with whoever you want – regardless of gender or their role in the wedding! You and your partner can get ready just the two of you if that floats your boat.
Bride being walked down the aisle by her father
This is something important to some people and others not!!! Everyone has different relationships with their family. I’ve seen mothers, brothers, son and sisters walk their loved one down the aisle. I’ve seen two lovely older gentleman walk down the aisle together being lead by their adorable furr babies. Some people walk by themselves or the couple do it together. There’s no right or wrong because there’s so many different couples.
Heck, ride a unicycle if that’s what you want do!!!! Or skip the whole ‘walking down the aisle’ thing altogether
The traditional ‘girl squad’ ‘boy squad’ matchy matchy is being changed up all the time and it’s wonderful.
Choose the people who are important to you (regardless of age or gender) to stand there with you on this special day. Or scrap the whole idea all together and make it just the two of you.
Cutting the cake
So traditionally the cake cutting is about the bride cutting the cake to symbolise the loss of her virginity. Ew.
Cakes are pretty darn snazzy so I can totally understand wanting to get some fab photos with these gorgeous pieces of art!! Bbbuuuuttttt it’s absolutely not a must. Dessert table, ice cream vans, donut towers or other alternatives are also very cool!
This might be something you’ve always dreamed of…. Or your worst nightmare!!!!! If someone is going to be spending the entire day riddled with anxiety about this there’s other ways to get the dance floor hopping. Hire an awesome DJ and or MC and let them take chance.
Love the idea of a first dance but want to change it up a bit from the ye old waltz?! Take a deep dive into some of the amazing first dance mash ups or flash mobs at weddings.
If your culture has traditional dances you’d love to include then do it!!!
Always remember this day is about the two of you, and there are many ways you can make sure it’s a reflection of you. By making sure your wedding day is unique to you as a couple, it’s going to make you happy AND easier to let any minor mishaps go.
You do you boo!